Friday, July 15, 2011

Free For All Fridays With "The. Worst. Party. Ever."



So, I was asked to do a Sunday brunch party by Amy, the event planner.  I reluctantly agreed beacause working Sundays suck and people that do brunches suck most of all - it's a known restaurant fact! In addition, I kept hearing horror stories of Amy's dealings with the hostess of the party.  She was a micro-manager with way too much time on her hands.  She would regularly harass Amy with the most unimportant details of her birthday brunch. Yep, hat's right: she was throwing her 50th birthday party for herself! So damn pathetic!  O.C.D. and her upper middle class sense of entitlement made for quite a handful!


The Hostess:
The mother of the hostess of this shindig was a piece of work as well.  She was attached to her hip, second and third guessing every little thing.  Her face was pulled tightly by years of plastic surgery procedures and she seemed to be doped up on Xanax or something.  She had this creepy baby doll like glossy stare.


The Mother:



To put it plainly, this party was chock full of assholes! It ran the gamut from vapid housewives to cunty old bags, all with their hen pecked husbands in tow!  One of the few cool people there was the birthday girl's uncle.  He was a nice old relic but he looked like the reanimated corpse of Milton Berle!


The Uncle:  





Ya know how they say there's one in every bunch? Well imagine what the standout of this roomful of assholes was like!!  She was the uber-bitch!!  Out of a party of 50 some odd people I was responsible for taking the orders for half of the room.  The first person who I approached was this fuck face!  She started in with her demeaning manner telling me that she was allergic to carrots or something and needed to change around the whole menu.  I had been through enough abuse by these jackasses so I wasn't gonna take anymore from her. Long story short: we got into it pretty bad to the point where it turned into a yelling match and I refused to deal with her anymore, sending Amy over to take over! We spent the rest of the afternoon giving each other dirty looks as she talked about me to the other guests at her table and I talked about her to my coworkers and drew these lovely pictures of her!


The Uber-Bitch:






Caked on make-up , a leopard print dress and a broken arm in a sling: now that's a lot of look!!


rod

No comments:

Post a Comment